Humor Random Comments Thread

[Urwumpe]

"We have to inform you about the passing away of Karl Ranseier. Karl Ranseier was the most unsuccessful astronaut in the universe. He started his career circling around his parents. His biggest success was the discovery of water and microbiological lifeforms near the Dutch shore. He died yesterday afternoon from sudden onset of acceleration after falling from the fixed service structure of his rocket."

 

[mojoey]

Discovering the flemish isn't really an 'achievement'.

 

[Urwumpe]

Discovering the flemish isn't really an 'achievement'.

I tried to improvise a classic Karl Ranseier.

 

[jedidia]

Had to abort an important examn last week because the setup of the computers we had to write it on wasn't working properly for the whole class. Turns out that the cause of this was that the image from which the setup was installed experienced the tender love of a crypto locker. This school just continues to inspire my confidence :facepalm:

 

[Enjo]

Yesterday I learned that my polish friend in Germany died of cancer...
Although she was mid-40, she was still hot... and very nice

That's the second polish friend in Germany, that I lost this year. Another one hanged himself in a forest that I see from my balcony in Hildesheim... The depressive Hildesheim killed the poor guy.

His pride never let me help him, although I had exact solutions to his problems. What's tragicomic to me, is that he repaired my sofa, that my wife and I had broken together when we... you know

 

[Urwumpe]

The depressive Hildesheim killed the poor guy.

I hardly remember Hildesheim as extremely depressing sight (Go a bit east to Salzgitter or a bit north to Hanover for comparison)... But that doesn't really matter if you are depressed anyway. Depressed people would even feel bad at the Copacabana.

 

[jedidia]

Depressed people would even feel bad at the Copacabana.

They'd probably feel especially bad at the Copacabana...

 

[Urwumpe]

Some small warning here:

The internet connection issues of the German Telekom provider since yesterday evening seem to be caused by a massive world-wide attack against an known vulnerability in the TR-069 protocol on Port 7547. Goal seems to be to extend a Mirai-like bot net.

https://isc.sans.edu/diary/Port+7547+SOAP+Remote+Code+Execution+Attack+Against+DSL+Modems/21759

The SOAP envelope send to the modems attempts to download and run an executable in a Linux-like environment.

My modem also had a small glitch yesterday, will need to check if any misconfiguration was attempted (but I doubt it, AVM should be safe).

The known to be affected modems are Speedport devices (rebranded from various manufacturers for the Telekom).

---------- Post added 11-29-16 at 01:09 AM ---------- Previous post was 11-28-16 at 05:58 PM ----------

Update: AVM devices are reported by AVM to be immune to the attack, I can confirm it here with a sample size of 1.

Telekom reacted by offering a free day of mobile internet as work around and:

 

[PhantomCruiser]

Anybody have plans for Gatlinburg this holiday? Due to the wildfires there might not even be a Gatlinburg. A big section of Pigeon Forge is being evacuated tonight too. We finally got some much needed rain, but I'm not sure how much it'll save.

Two of the girls the kiddo danced with have jobs at different venues in Pigeon Forge. One is at the Smokey Mountain Opry, the other at the Hatfields and McCoy's. Both of them have reported that they are safe.

The Park Vista hotel in G-burg is a pile of ashes. If anyone has visite Gatlinburg, that's the hotel up on the hill from Ripley's museum and the needle.

Looks like the Aquarium of the Smokies is surrounded. The staff was rounded up in a mandatory evacuation earlier this morning.

 

[Linguofreak]

People I have been angry at today:

Canonical
The Linux kernel team
Nvidia
The GRUB development team
Me
AT&T
Canonical
The Linux kernel team
Maybe Intel?

To count my blessings, as bad as that sounds (what with the "Grub development team, me" bit), my computer was not at any point unbootable.

But I'm not going to be able to upgrade to Ubuntu 16.04 for who knows how long.

Bonus points to anyone who can reconstruct my evening based on the above.

 

[mojoey]

Somebody was trying to update to 16.04 LTS.

 

[Linguofreak]

Somebody was trying to update to 16.04 LTS.

Yes, but what transpired between starting the upgrade and giving up in frustration?

 

[PhantomCruiser]

Being angry with AT&T is called being an AT&T customer. Just the way it is.

I mean seriously, look at their corporate logo. Then look at the Death Star. Coincidence? I think not.

 

[Urwumpe]

I am angry at the construction workers, who needed to make a full kilometer of the bypass to Gifhorn a single lane road with traffic lights letting only two cars pass for each direction.... and that for having three small trucks stand on the side of the road and a dozen workers, of which 4 had been doing the work and 8 had been standing around or helped moving the trucks a few meters further down....

 

[tl8]

I am angry at the construction workers, who needed to make a full kilometer of the bypass to Gifhorn a single lane road with traffic lights letting only two cars pass for each direction.... and that for having three small trucks stand on the side of the road and a dozen workers, of which 4 had been doing the work and 8 had been standing around or helped moving the trucks a few meters further down....

Wait, I thought you Germans were efficient at that sort of thing?

 

[Urwumpe]

Wait, I thought you Germans were efficient at that sort of thing?

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: :rofl::rofl::rofl: :rofl::rofl::rofl: :rofl: :rofl::rofl::rofl: :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

No.


(We should be. But in reality, we somehow always resort on the worst implementation of a waterfall model project management.)

 

[Artlav]

No.

Hm, makes me wonder what would be the German equivalent of this pole impact aftermath timelapse:

 

[Andy44]

Hm, makes me wonder what would be the German equivalent of this pole impact aftermath timelapse:
At the very root. KamAZ hit the post - YouTube

That was way more entertaining to watch than I thought it'd be.

 

[birdmanmike]

What, like how many (insert nationality of choice here)s does it take to change a light bulb?

 

[Urwumpe]

What, like how many (insert nationality of choice here)s does it take to change a light bulb?

Germans: 99 specialists

One to do a feasibility study about the exchange of light bulbs during operation.
One to rescue the first and do CPR.
One to do a feasibility study about the exchange of light bulbs after turning power off.
One to do an alternative study about the benefits of darkness.
One to reply on Greenpeace questions about the power consumption of the light bulb.
One to do a cost-use-analysis of different lightbulb types.
One to create a European-wide request for bids according to the law.
One to order different samples of light-bulbs.
Nineteen QA engineers testing the samples.
One to design a new special counter-rotating ladder for lightbulb exchanges.
One to train a group of light-bulb-exchange specialists for the use of counter-rotating ladders
One to climb the ladder in a valiant endeavour to go where no German engineer has ever gone before.
One to point out that the socket is a E27 and not a E14.
One to quickly create a E27 to E14 adapter from a paperclip and chewing gum wrap
One to turn power back on because it is too dark to see anything......