Humor Voyager Heavily Damaged in Collision

[Thunder Chicken]

PASADENA, CA—Confirming that several components had broken off the craft and that most of its scientific instruments were no longer operational, officials from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory announced that Voyager 1, the pioneering space probe launched in 1977, had been severely damaged Thursday after crashing into the end of the universe.

“It appears that, at approximately 8:20 this morning, Voyager struck the edge of the universe head-on at a speed of 38,000 miles per hour, resulting in significant structural damage to the spacecraft,” said Voyager project scientist Ed Stone, noting that the force of the impact with the outer border of the cosmos had bent the probe’s main antenna dish and completely snapped off its low-field magnetometer. “While we’re receiving only intermittent signals from Voyager now, incoming data indicate that, in addition to nearly totaling the craft’s thermoelectric generator, the collision left a significant dent in the end of the universe as well.”

JPL scientists added that Voyager 1 now appears to be moving laterally, scraping its left side along the universe’s outer edge, and that it is expected to continue doing so for the next 50 or 60 years until the remaining fragments of the probe eventually come to rest in the bottom-right corner of outer space.

http://www.theonion.com/article/voyager-probe-badly-damaged-after-smashing-end-uni-52996

 

[boogabooga]

You scared me for a second.

 

[Thunder Chicken]

You scared me for a second.

My delivery was perfect then :thumbup:

 

[Codz]

Just swap insurance info.

 

[Andy44]

Funny. My first reaction was "what are the odds you'd collide with anything in space that empty?" It's not like the cloud of space junk that is LEO, after all.

 

[Thunder Chicken]

Just swap insurance info.

With whom?

 

[Linguofreak]

I was actually rather disappointed.

I mean, at first I thought "Oh, cool, impact with debris in interstellar space, this ought to be interesting."

And then I got to the edge of the universe bit...

 

[Codz]

With whom?

Haha, the Cosmos obviously.

 

[Thunder Chicken]

Haha, the Cosmos obviously.

Brings a whole new meaning to a "cosmic adjustment". :lol:

 

[Mortov Molotov]

A bit late for an April fool's joke, don't you think? ?

Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk

 

[garyw]

Umm, if it's thermoelectric generator snapped off that would kill all the power so I call fake here.... :rofl:

 

[dman]

@##$% Women drivers............

 

[RisingFury]

Umm, if it's thermoelectric generator snapped off that would kill all the power so I call fake here.... :rofl:

So... you draw the line at the power source being gone, but not at hitting the edge of the universe?

 

[GLS]

So... you draw the line at the power source being gone, but not at hitting the edge of the universe?

It could have hit this:

The article could be true and mankind just had its first contact with Q :rofl::rofl:.

 

[Andy44]

Or better yet, this. From the first episode with Kirk, the Enterprise finds a barrier at the edge of the galaxy:

 

[Thunder Chicken]

It could have hit this:

The article could be true and mankind just had its first contact with Q :rofl::rofl:.

Or Q had his first contact with humanity: