Humor 5 Word Story

[andysim]

They all opened thier sandwiches...

 

[Spacethingy]

...and found wabbit anti-ham instead...

 

[T.Neo]

...which tore through Mimas's crater ...

 

[Izack]

...and into Stickney, heading for...

 

[Pyromaniac605]

...Diemos whose location was close...

 

[Rtyh-12]

...to the house of the Probe.

 

[Spacethingy]

...who, luckily, wasn't at home...

(Are commas and apostrophes allowed? :lol

 

[Pyromaniac605]

...because he would have to...

 

[OrbiterSpore]

..find the great Strangelet that...

 

[autopilotman]

.....had accidentally welded his groin.......

 

[Spacethingy]

...to the Antiprobe!

 

[Rtyh-12]

5 word story please!

 

[Spacethingy]

Yeah, yeah all right...

...to the nefarious Antiprobe!

Looks like we need a quick recap, people.
Thanks to Krys for the first bit:

It all started on that routine mission to the ISS to deliver a supply of bacon that the crew would feed to their space goats so the goats would provide a steady supply of milk and delicious anhydrous ammonium sulfate.

When the mission arrived however, they discovered that the goats were actually HAL's test subjects and the pants were dead. Captain Lee Nash, having experience ordered the supply crew to find the nearest Starbucks where the Galkin Empire had yet to sell their delicious sandwiches.

The crew discovered an unusual magnetic anomaly, blocking the door preventing them from leaving the Hypnotoad in the airlock with Suwako's hat.

Meanwhile, back at Uranus, the evil scientest was running around, frantically searching for the Illudium Q-36 Space Modulator which he would use to hunt wabbits from orbital altitude, wabbits being hyperevolved bunnies that spelt their species with "w" because they could not pronounce anything since they were wabbits.

Back on Earth, the Earthlings were hailing the almighty Probe when they noticed a giant flying beer can approaching Antarctica, and they were like OMG it was approaching at relativistic power levels, over 9 THOUSAND TIMES THE SPEED OF SNAILS!

The beer can hit the atmosphere at over mach twenty causing a chain reaction in The Flux Capicator, igniting the bacon, which dismayed the astronauts who like their bacon raw, not cooked by relativistic beer which doesn't help much when starving astronauts are trying to stop their bacon from overcooking and creating holes in space-time.

The holes are caused by zombies who are heading to Jupiter to awaken the Great Zombie who wants to eat the all-mighty Probe! (oh no!!) and the bacon that the Wabbit's stole, at least he didn't know it then they were hungry for brains as all zombies should be. More accurately, Wabbit bwaaainnns, which bared a strange resemblance to Earthling's brains, which are indeed quite tasty!

Meanwhile, the Probe sensed it's game, Steel Horizon, was being stolen by the evil mutant Antiprobe, Leela, who was making out like a bandit.

She stole the launch codes for the Batmobile which would then fly inverted, to compensate for the atmospheric drag caused by the duck, and its nefarious accomplice Arnold Schwarzenegger, who blew up the moon and many other cities, towns and his house in Quebec, where lies the banned cell phones while orbiting. They needed the Batmobile to bring them all under control and vanquish the Space Goats hopefully once and for all.

But nobody thought that it was not yet northern summer, though it was unseasonably warm, for a Cretaceous marine environment, which meant there were dinosaurs who were going to attack an alien living under silicates with Charley Bolden as the person who is called Voyager.

Nevertheless, Doc Brown wanted to talk with Martin Schweiger about things that happened during the Z-War which killed many Orbinauts. This war, also known as the battle for the yoghurt and more importantly the bacon was won by Harry Potter who was then killed by Darth Vader (who was eating popcorn out of a bag of french fries).

When probe came to confront the Antiprobe for the final and ultimate battle, to determine who gets to roll first. That is, roll of bacon. However, as the Man on the moon came...

...out of Tycho to confront the lesser Wabbit who was not really a wabbit, but armed with an antimatter positronic rubber chicken, which he used to kill the entire population and, once and for all extinguish them.

But wait, two Jedi Knights came to fight the crazy dancing hamsters who only tangoed on Tuesday afternoons to offer battle to under-dressed penniless tourists in a camper van on their way to Albuquerque when they got lost during a pillow fight with supermodels using antimatter plasma nuclear birdshot stolen from Will E Coyote, who finally managed to kill an engineer at Acme for him hailing the Anti-Probe.

Also, the moon got closer to Earth as was predicted. Of course no one expected Leeroy Jenkins had secretly planned to use robot ninja weasels to facilitate careful planning of the next annoying, wholly uninteresting political election, that destroyed the nacho king and established the burger king as the supreme ruler of the greatest ever most awesome C-C-C-Combo Breaker of the century (with a side of Bacon).

But whenever the burger king ate all of the chili (a double post would resume bumping the thread back up) the world; as we know vanished and reappeared next to a McDonalds, not again, ****, where swearing is quite common using scrabble tiles while holding a large socket wrench.

However, part of the moon exploded the Probe (Hail Mighty Probe!). Actually that didn't happen, but the moon actually imploded: "******!" Hey, that was no Moon, it was a huge intergalactic meatball headed straight towards the lost "Island of Open-Minded Stewardesses" whose minds were open to sharp insertable metallic foreign objects, which can cause bad FOD to everyone who has a masters degree in engineering or crooked ears but not if your current trajectory takes you around Fred's house uphill of the "OFMM needs you" sign, where Fred and his soviet beagle flying an antisatellite weapon which destroyed the Probe, causing time to reverse, allowing the Oceanic Eight Fifteen survivors to board the SS Minow instead, but also returned the Probe.

Historians from the future attempt to sticky this thread, preserving what's left of OF humor. The attempt did not work for long, but luckily, someone bought more desperately needed bacon!

Meanwhile, on Hyperion where the Shrike, hungry for bacon and ravenous office workers woke up. The surprised exo-ornithologist thought: "Get me out of here!" He cried from his net made from fish and creosote. "Fear the Necroposter!" he raved, "You keep what you write!"

With everything back to normal, they all opened thier sandwiches and found wabbit anti-ham instead which tore through Mimas's crater and into Stickney, heading for Diemos whose location was close to the house of the Probe, who, luckily, wasn't at home, because he would have to find the great Strangelet that had accidentally welded his groin to the nefarious Antiprobe!

The forum not only features general ORBITER-related topics, but also includes tutorials, physics, educational, and mathematics discussions, tools for software development and testing, and “real-life” space news.

Do you think we're missing something here?!

Edit: ALL RIGHT! D'you think we're missing something?

 

[Rtyh-12]

Again, 5 words >_>

 

[Stevodoran]

The Probe is actually a.........

 

[iamwearingpants]

...loveless Dalek planning to discover...

 

[tonytwo]

You will surly die today.