I pulled out the telescope lastnight to try and cop a view or two and could only see jupiter. Dont get me wrong, jupiter is my favorite planet, but light pollution and the fact that my telescope constitutes "department store" grade makes for tough viewing. Although, I have an actual fund I have been putting money into to purchase a better telescope.
The night sky makes me think. In a peaceful way, I sometimes think about death and my atoms going back into the universe. What death will be like... I give thanks to the stars who forged my atoms making my life possible. I think about past astronomers like Hubble. I am humble, and proud to know that I know nothing outside of what little man has learned. I am 34, and the chances of me setting the world on fire by making a discovery is or has already come to a close. Acceptance, that I ignored space and pushed it out of my mind for so long only to return in this capacity.
Learning math has been my biggest joy... It truly did open the cosmos to me in a special way by giving me understanding. Im just getting tired of documentaries, books, lectures and everything else.. Dont get my wrong, I LOVE all of that.. but.. I have an Itch to DO something... anything... I just dont know what. Its my million dollar question right now. I would love to make some contribution to science, give back, just something positive...